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Sun, Jul. 15th, 2007, 05:45 am
doradora2: My Wish - SANS - Daughter-in-law

Judge Judy wanted this story for her TV show. Maybe it could be a pilot for a new reality show.
My oldest son is a closet gay. He has spent most of his life hiding,acting, running, talking and doing the "two-step" to keep people in the dark and keep his secret safe. His only problem? He desperately wanted a military career. He had unsuccessfully dated girls through high school and college. But they never stuck around for very long.  He continued, slowly, on the path to the US Army and his commission. Fast forward about 10 or so years. He is now WAY over the usual age of the newly enlisted but he is determined to be an officer, he is more scared than ever that his deep dark secret will interfer with his now his imminent enlistment.
Right out of the blue, he calls and he's getting married. WOW! No one knew he was dating anyone!
It was shocking news for more than  just me!
So, he brings his new "fiancee" to meet the family. This is where satan entered our lives in the form of Sans H Cristine!
This girl arrived with a bad attitude and a deep insecurity. She never got more than 6" away from my son the whole 3 day visit. Including sitting on his lap while he tried to study for a test he had to take when they got back. She never had a "one on one" conversation with anyone in the family.. They left a BBQ held in their honor and were gone for over 2 hrs. while all the guests waited for them. What were they doing....looking at rocks! 
When they left for home, the concensus was that there was no love lost between the family and the new bride to be.
What did we learn from her... hmmm.. sister is gay, mother is remarried to alcoholic, puerto rican descent, doesn't cook, stays out of the sun to make sure she looks white not hispanic, most people dislike her,she told us this!! (weird). She really is FULL of arrogance and selfishness.

No one from our family in the north went to the wedding in Florida. We are damned to burn in hell! 
How dare we not go to HER grand production of a wedding!
Her THEME wedding had everything from 12th century monks to scifi creatures from star wars, to my son dressed in his military blues!! 1400 photos later it was a nightmare in living color!
They are both theater people, (where else would a gay man hide in plain site?)
She and her sister proceeded to trash us on the internet by publishing a slander page.
 The whole scene has gone from bad to worse, now she calls me a stalker and accuses me of cyber stalking her and hacking into her computer! First, I'm an "ignorant hillbilly"(quote), now I'm a computer geek capable of breaking into her computer from around the world. What a joke!
It has come down to her putting, get this, a LIFETIME protection order on me so I can never contact my son again. I've only met her once and they live half way across the united states.
The police called them ridiculous, using the legal system to suit themselves.
I should be the one putting the P.O. on her for threatening to use her " many weapons and skills" on me. 
OH NO!! I forgot she's from a pirate ship or sherwood forest,, or a space ship or a crypt?
Her arrogance even went so far as to send my EX husbands family a letter telling them all her school accomplishments and bragging herself up. They could give a sweet shit! Hysterical!
(She thinks no one here is educated), god forbid you misspell a word, she is positively ANAL about it. 
Now that she has been "in the family" for 4 yrs. she's only gotten worse. 
The girl is absolutely not cute, attractive or beautiful. Her mouth is enough to make you want to slap her on the spot. We think she is a confused gay like her sister. Of course her sister is nothing but a confused lump of flesh. And the DIL is as shapely as a broom. She plays male parts in the theatre. And she denies being hispanic, what is that??
There it is, my gay son married a probably gay woman, so he can have his military career. 
She has shut the family out of my sons life.
We may be from the woods and live a simple life but we are normal, everyday Americans. 
When people enter your life from a sick environment, take heed, your whole family could become infected.
We know my son is not in his right mind. His life of hiding has warped him. And his wife has poisoned him.
He is in a world that is NOT where he's meant to be, and he is fearful of really being who he should be.
Thanks for listening.

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 04:18 am (UTC)
lisamartin

Bitch, please.

You seem to know an awful lot about someone who "never had a "one on one" conversation with anyone in the family".

*blow kiss*

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 12:33 pm (UTC)
doradora2

No actually, we know a whole lot about the DIL. All aspects of her life are plastered all over the internet. On the other hand, her knowledge of our family is secondhand. What she writes about her husbands family is twisted by her hatred, anger, and her own personal failures.
It is amazing to me that anyone would stand up for her.

P.S. FYI - Sans H cast the first stone in this battle of words. There are no other disruptive relationships in our family. And, there was none between me and my son before the SANS.
Evil begets evil.

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 01:27 pm (UTC)
doradora2

P.S. I gave about 200 pages of the "ramblings" of Sans H to my friend Dr. Dan, the shrink. The follow-up from him was just what I knew it would be....this woman needs psychiatric help. Just from a quick analysis of her own words, he said more than likely she has borderline personality disorder and she has multiple symptoms of depression, plus anger issues.
I shared the diagnosis with the family.
So, we all understand the SANS now, all screwed up!

Wed, Jul. 18th, 2007 01:00 am (UTC)
lady_spaz

As a psychology major, I really must question this Dr. Dan, and how you call him a 'shrink'. Are we talking psychologist or psychiatrist? And any decent doctor would not list that many disorders against a person just from writings- it's easy to mask who you are and what you're like in words across a page, you need to meet a person several times to even begin to formulate a diagnosis.

Also, I find it appalling and insulting that you consider legitimate disorders that some people struggle with all their life 'being screwed up'. People don't want to be this way and having these disorders doesn't make them sick or messed up or screwed up, or whatever you want to call it. It simply means they have something they have to work through that most people could never understand or comprehend.

I'd like to talk to this Dr. Dan. I'm admit I'm curious now as to who he is and if you know him personally.

... or just online.

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 02:24 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous)

Do you have any idea how racist, shallow, homophobic and ignorant your post sounds? Hi, I'm a good friend of your DIL's sister, and I happen to be a foreign national . So, I take it you'll hate me now because I'm not white & I have 3 college degrees. I cannot believe that you are so shallow that your perception of your DIL's physical appearance makes you "want to slap her on the spot".

Why don't you take your post to Dr. Dan your friend the shrink? I'm sure he'd have a lot of interesting things to say about you, you pathetic, bitter old woman. The fact that missed your son's wedding because of your trivial, fabricated issues with your DIL just makews me pity you.

But, thank you! Thank you very much for being the poster child of Everything-I-Do-Not-Wish-To-Be-Like-When-I-Grow-Old. I will cherish the image of you that you have projected in this post & strive to be the exact opposite of you. So, thank you! Every time I have a bitter, unkind thought I will remember you & that will scare me into being a nicer person.

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 04:44 pm (UTC)
doradora2: Who Cares What You Think?

HA! You truly are a laughable joke, dear anonymous. You obviously have not analyzed SANS H's thoughts and opinions in the same glaring light.
She is way beyond me at being pathetic, add worthless to the list.
You need to mind your own life, you look like a total idiot butting into a family situation between me and the SANS.(obviously you know this, you posted anonymous!). At least I have enough sense to stay out of strangers problems!
Getting involved in things of which you only know one very lop-sided view is dangerous.. Besides all that, Who really gives a fuck what you think?
Except maybe your close friend the SANS.
Your ethnicity, education or whatever, mean squat to me. (I love the hornblowing by the SANS groupies!)
You've shown that your nothing more than an arrogant, nosy, know it all, busybody. You actually think you are so righteous and above everyone that you can sit in judgment of anyone or anything you please?
Doesn't work for me, sorry.
If my posts help you be a better person, great, you probably need help!Oh by the way, I am not prejudice, homophobic, racist or shallow. No, not old or bitter either, very happy, enjoying life, got the world by the tail!
You got it all wrong, anonymous! Hope I didn't crush your big fat ego.

The comments I have made are DIRECTLY related to words written or spoken by DIL. Judge that!

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 05:04 pm (UTC)
lisamartin: Re: Who Cares What You Think?

You actually think you are so righteous and above everyone that you can sit in judgment of anyone or anything you please?

Why shouldn't they? You have done so to both your son, his chosen profession and his wife.

If you are so bored as to have to bring all this up again, come on over to my area, I have a post that might interest you. Enjoy.

Tue, Jul. 17th, 2007 09:27 pm (UTC)
superjew4711: Re: Who Cares What You Think?

ftw.

Wed, Jul. 18th, 2007 04:42 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: Who Cares What You Think?

So, correct me if I'm wrong - you say this is a "family situation" & I should "stay out of" it... well, if this is so personal, then why did you post it on a public forum? and why did you not leap down the throats of the others who responded? So, all I can infer from this vitreous spewing is that you cannot handle anyone disagreeing with you (though almost every response here did disagree with you) & that you're rather immature for a 54 year old.

As to "who gives a fuck" what I think? Obviously you do or you wouldn't have bothered responding. Why did I post anonymously? Considering the fact that you've stalked your own son to the point that he's had to place arestraining order against you, I doubt I'd be stupid enough to blatantly flaunt my identity so that you could stalk me as well.

And incidentally, dear, you did not crush my "big fat ego" but thank you for the concern. It was truly touching.

Toodles!

Thu, Jul. 19th, 2007 08:33 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous): Re: Who Cares What You Think?

Hey Anon 1, this is Anon 2--if you can't figure out who this is, think 'big hair'. :P Or quercitin. (Spell check just highlighted that. I wonder if it's really wrong or if LJ spell check just doesn't know it.) At this point you've probably figured out who this is just from the random tangent, lol.

Amen to the 'if you don't want people responding, don't post on a public forum' thing.

Literally never met Cristine in person. Don't care. Not my problem. Just want to know one thing, Original Poster Lady--if you're not homophobic, then why do you keep accusing Cristine of being gay and talking about her sister being gay as if it was an insult?

Also, I'm still trying to figure out why you would get 'gay' from a woman whom, according to you, wouldn't leave her boyfriend's side for an entire visit. Sounds pretty het and clingy to me.

~Let's just call me Quercitin,
spelled however it's supposed to be spelled

Wed, Jul. 18th, 2007 09:56 pm (UTC)
(Anonymous)

I don't think I understand here. Are you upset that your son is gay or in the military? Gays can serve in the military as long as they are quite about it. Secondly Officers do not enlist in the military. They are appointed. You son had to go through schooling to get a commission and he had to have a back ground check and all sorts of things. I am sure if he had a questionable history, this would had been found out.

What I don't understand, if this Cristine was such an issue when you first met her. Why didn't you discuss this with your son? Granted, My own personal opinion is that if my son is happy with the girl he chooses, then it is up to him deal with her. Not like you have to live with her.

Just out curiosity, before your son brought Cristine to visit, when was the last time you saw him before that? Were you truly involved in his life as most mothers are or was he on his own? I imagine, if he signed a Restraint Order against you he had to show just cause.

I do take offense to you derogatory comments towards Puerto Ricans. What do you have against people from Puerto Rico?

I have issues with my MIL and Aunt. They expect everyone to be coordinate their issues around their own fued and have 2 Christmas for each one of them with grandparents and such. I think alot of people who claim to be Christian, forget what it means to be Christian. As Christians we are suppose to remeber that to "Forgive is divine". Yet, even the OP just as my MIL seem to not be good examples of being Christian.

Wed, Mar. 2nd, 2011 05:57 pm (UTC)
irregularme: Your Daugther in-law

I read your post about your daughter in-law, and I think that I can help! I am currently working on a TV show that helps solve problems between in-laws. Please give me a call so that I can give you more information. My phone number is 212-564-2607 Ex:2317.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Joanna Zwickel